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Since It’s Sunday

I saw a very interesting show on the National Geographic channel last night.  It was about the search for Noah’s Ark.  I was expecting the usual History Channel version where there is never any view other than the biblical one given and bronze age gibberish accepted as fact and intrepid believers wandering around with a rock hammer in one hand and a bible in the other twisting everything they encountered to fit their primitive myths.  I was pleasantly surprised.

There were a group of Christian “scientists” in Turkey doing their best to show that the Ark had indeed landed in the mountains there with petrified timber, iron pegs, ground penetrating radar showing the layout of the framing, fossilized animal droppings and several other “proofs.”  Then there were real scientists that completely decimated these arguments.  From the fact that the process for making iron did not come along for a couple thousand years from the supposed time of the building of the ark, that the technology to build a boat of the dimensions in the bible was not available at the time of the “great flood,” recreations of the ark showing how much time it would have taken with Noah’s family only as his help (physically impossible without a massive labor force), reproductions of the ark put into wave chambers showing what would happen to the Ark as it was tossed about with no steering capabilities in storm ravaged seas (it flips, they all drown and none of us are here now) and so forth.

The interesting thing is that I was watching it with my 13-year-old son.  His logic was all over the show with comments about how all the fresh water fish would have been killed, the change of salinization due to the rain water and its effects on the salt water fish would have been devestating, the atmospheric oxygen/temperature at the elevations of the Ark if the water went higher than Mt. Everest,  the fact that everybody would be inbred ( I pointed out that was the inevitable outcome if one accepts the ludicrous Adam and Eve scenario with just two sons, one of which killed the other.  Mom was a busy lady…), what would the animals eat if the earth was submerged for over a month in water and the vegetation was killed and so forth.  I was quite impressed with his spontaneous rebuttals of the nonsense purported in this ancient myth.  I had to reply that logic cannot apply to the believers.  Magic is the only answer ( as was pointed out in an animation I posted several days ago).  The rules of physics suspended,  cause and effect restrained, the impossible made possible by the twitch of the nose by the Invisible Surveillance Guy In The Sky.

My son said that even given that, and here he looked at me with eyes wide, it meant that every one was killed on earth!  I said that was the point of this act and what was the lesson to be learned from this.  My son never blinked and just said, “God is a douchebag!”   I could not have been prouder.

I always hear of the great lessons the Bible has to teach us.  That our morals come from the lessons of that book of nonsense, gibberish and bronze age understanding of the cosmos and everything in it.  But I cannot fathom the positive message that one is supposed to glean from stories, quaint though they may be, of an all knowing, compassionate God creating the earth and putting an evil snake, a tree whose fruit his first people cannot eat, their banishment for eating of this fruit after the fact is given in Genesis that God created all herbs and fruits and that they were good.  Clearly he meant for his first people to fail.  From there it is one atrocity after another until this “all-knowing and compassionate” God gets fed up and….kills everybody but one family from the sticks of the middle east.  Abraham’s willingness to sacrifice his son, Lot turning his daughters out to be raped rather than give up a couple of angels who could just disappear and not suffer at the hands of a crowd…Lot’s wife turned to a pillar of salt for the heinous crime of looking back…the advocated genocide of any town or city who were in the way of  a people going to the land that their God gave to them…the whole ball of wax of the utter absurdity mixed with brutality of the Old Testament.  What are the positive lessons to be learned from those obscene tales?

The tale of Noah’s Ark is one of madness, a psychotic and twisted God, of the complete lack of compassion and understanding of the human condition.  It is a tale to be told as a horror story and not one of any uplifting message.  It should be an instruction to loathe and reject the mere concept of any “God” that would kill every man, woman and child on the face of our earth because they displease Him. 

And then what?  The descendants of Noah went out, repopulated the earth and started screwing up so bad again that, instead of killing them all once more, God made himself to be his own son,sent him to live with us sinful descendants of the survivors of that great flood,  had him killed and then come back to him and if one admits they believe this they will live happily ever after in heavenly morry-morry land, but only the people who mumble that proclamation in their heads and all else will burn forever and ever and ever in pain and suffering and damnation?

What is the point?  It seems that God is a three-year old child with a magic wand.

Fortunately, He doesn’t exist.

Amen.

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